A Thought Occurred to Me

Writer is deep in NaNoWriMo. He is blogging about it, and has made a few active connections. I believe that is good for him.

Before this time deactivating his OKC account, he had told me he was using to try to make connections with writers. I was using it to find platonic friends, so I know that was plausible. Except it wasn’t. He had told me about the gal (he thought) was from Missouri he was messaging, except I made friends with a local gal on there he was also messaging with and had not mentioned.. Yes she writes but she had mainly contacted him because his profile listed him as poly. He deactivated the account. I discovered much later that he was grooming that first gal for sexual encounters and emotional connection, all while promising at my request if he did message he would be clear on first messages that he was not seeing a sexual relationship. Lies to me and to her, but that is another story

I had encouraged him to find a non-relationship community online or locally to connect with writers. I even gave him several resources, but he was not interested.

Those he has made connections with through his blog, he is getting the positive attention and ego strokes in a non-sexual platform. That is good for him. Though I know he is off blog communicating with one of them, and I hope he can keep it from veering towards the sexual so he can discover the joys of communication and praise from the woman without turning it sexual.

But, if I am to let go I need to remember that his sex addiction is not my circus, and he is not my monkey. I just don’t want to see anyone else get hurt the way my family was, he is no longer part of that family and likely never will be again. And that hurts.

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About Apophenias

I'm human. Female. Self-employed. Searching for connections in the randomness of life. Currently residing the US. ... And not quite defined by being in the midst of a biological ticking.
This entry was posted in Healing, polyamory, Sex addiction and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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