How Could I Not See It All

Another blow to the heart today.

This past summer my neighbor’s daughter and a friend spent a night at my home. I had a twin in guest bedroom and a sleeper couch in living room. Near the end of the day, they asked if I minded if they both slept in the guest room.

Yesterday the daughter visited her dad again, and asked him to say hi to me. He relayed that she has asked if I was still with Writer, and was relieved when he said no.. mentioning to him that the reason they both chose to stay in the room was because they were uncomfortable around my love.

How did I not see that?

How did I miss it when my family tells me how creepy it was when he stared at my son’s gf at family gatherings?

I saw it with my tenant and confronted him as soon as I was aware. But how did I miss the others. Were there more I missed? Was I blind?

It is not my fault, his actions. But I feel like I failed my family and friends by not being more aware of how they felt.

If you cannot trust the one you love, the one who you believe would never harm you, who can you trust.

Is a life like that even worth living?


About Apophenias

I'm human. Female. Self-employed. Searching for connections in the randomness of life. Currently residing the US. ... And not quite defined by being in the midst of a biological ticking.
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3 Responses to How Could I Not See It All

  1. cheaterfantasy says:

    So many things we do not see but maybe subconsciously we do and we choose to ignore. It is like looking at life through a happy lens not seeing the bad. Who knows. It does tell you something. Xxx


    • Apophenias says:

      What would that tell me? That nobody else mattered? That I was a terrible person for not seeing my love for what he was doing? That I am just as guilty as he?


      • cheaterfantasy says:

        No, not at all. It is just everyone will view things from their own perceived perception.
        It is a fact of life that if two people view a incident they will have different opinions and in your case you were just seeing the good.


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