Author Archives: Apophenias

About Apophenias

I'm human. Female. Self-employed. Searching for connections in the randomness of life. Currently residing the US. ... And not quite defined by being in the midst of a biological ticking.

My Experience Staying Safe Using Craigslist – part 1

Posted on June 26, 2016 by Apophenias

Meeting anyone you have met online for any purpose can be scary. One local police department dedicated part of their parking lot to a video monitored online sales exchange location. I thought that was pretty cool, though it does nothing … Continue reading →

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Chronic Pain

Posted on June 18, 2016 by Apophenias

Constant chronic pain Physical and Emotional Who would notice Who would care If I disappeared tomorrow Don’t be sad tomorrow You didn’t care yesterday When I needed you When I begged for you

Posted in Poetry and Prose | 1 Comment

Medical Challenges

Posted on June 9, 2016 by Apophenias

If you recall, I had thought I could be pregnant a couple months back, and wasn’t. Nausea, abdominal pain, fatigue, no period had continued. So follow up visit this week included CT scan and revealed Pelvic Congestion Syndrome (varicose veins … Continue reading →

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The Losses Keep Piling Up

Posted on June 1, 2016 by Apophenias

I hope to freaking god that Krys is my final loss for the near future. I may be stronger for the losses, but the lonely factor sure does pile up Tally for recent past (less than 5 years) Divorce. Death … Continue reading →

Posted in Healing, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Blank

Posted on May 30, 2016 by Apophenias

Blank The canvas of my romantic future Now whitewashed with despair Shall the previous paint bleed through Marring the portrait yet to be created? Inspired by Today’s “One Word Prompt” – http://wp.me/p23sd-12cv Image Source

Posted in Dating, Poetry and Prose | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Holding On

Posted on May 29, 2016 by Apophenias

This weekend I am completing my move. Only a year in the making. My mom, my son, Krys, and a few neighbors pitched in yesterday. Today Krys was going to keep helping, and tomorrow my mom again. Krys was giving … Continue reading →

Posted in Dating, Uncategorized | 2 Comments

Another Confirmation that I Don’t Matter

Posted on May 20, 2016 by Apophenias

This week was ex Al’s birthday I reminded our son that his father would probably really appreciate at least a call. Why did I do that? On the day, I got a text meant for the ex from some family … Continue reading →

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When You Need a Good Cry

Posted on May 15, 2016 by Apophenias

Ever had a time when you needed or wanted to cry to release all those bottled up emotions? What do you do? Share on the comments. Here’s my new favorite video clip for just that occasion http://youtu.be/0qA6Pn3SFbE

Posted in Bonfire Musings, Healing | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

My EMDR Journey 1

Posted on May 10, 2016 by Apophenias

I started the preliminaries for EMDR.  Haven’t gotten into the meat of it yet, however I’m very optimistic about it. Even with one session we have identified how interconnected are the events and situations that create triggers for me. This … Continue reading →

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Greatest Need in a Relationship

Posted on April 25, 2016 by Apophenias

I’ve posted before about my wish list in a partner. Today ruminating about overall, what is my greatest need in a relationship. I believe I have distilled it down to this: Dear Love, I have done my best to survive … Continue reading →

Posted in Dating, Healing, Poetry, Rants | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment